F’ever ‘n Ever
(Two girls going through a pile of stuff)
SHEILA: Yours or mine?
VIV: Uh ... yours.
SHEILA: Yours. (Puts it in a pile.)
VIV: Mine. Yours. Mine.
SHEILA: No. I got that one when we went camping two summers ago.
VIV: OK. (Sorts objects.) Yours, mine. Yours. Mine. Mine. Mine. Yours.
SHEILA: I think this one's mine. But this one's yours.
VIV: Uh-unh. That one's mine.
SHEILA: You sure?
VIV: Uh-huh. I got it on that trip we took to Disney World. Don't you remember? In fifth grade.
SHEILA: This is mine for sure.
VIV: No, it isn't.
SHEILA: Viv. I got that when we went canoeing.
VIV: No, Sheila. I got that for my birthday.
SHEILA: (Takes it.) It's mine.
VIV: (Takes it back.) In your wildest dreams.
SHEILA: (Takes object.) It's mine and you can't have it.
VIV: (Tug of war) It's mine and I'm taking it.
SHEILA: Not if I have anything to say about it.
VIV: Well, you don't.
SHEILA: (Tugging, pulling) That's just like you. Totally selfish.
VIV: You want everything you can get your hands on.
SHEILA: If I didn't, you'd take it all with you.
VIV: (Circling each other, like panthers) Of course I want to take it with me. I don't know when I'll get back. If I ever get back.
SHEILA: I hope you never come back.
VIV: Maybe I won't.
SHEILA: Promises, promises. You know you're never coming back.
VIV: I told you I'd be here Thanksgiving.
SHEILA: That's a lifetime away. Who knows where you'll be by then? Probably on Mars.
VIV: I'm only moving to Atlanta.
SHEILA: Might as well be Mars.
VIV: Look, it's not my fault my dad got a big promotion. I don't want to go either. But I have to.
SHEILA: You don't have to take all my stuff with you.
VIV: This is mine. And I'm taking it.
SHEILA: It's mine, and I'm keeping it.
VIV: You always have to have everything, don't you?
SHEILA: Me? You're the one who can't stand to be left out of anything. I can't even go to the bathroom without you following me.
VIV: Well, aren't you glad I'm moving?
SHEILA: Yes. I'm thrilled. I just wish you'd left a week ago.
VIV: Well, I didn't. And you're stuck with me for three more days. If you can stand it. If I can stand it.
SHEILA: I don't have to stand it. You aren't staying with me.
VIV: I am too.
SHEILA: No, you aren't.
VIV: I am. We agreed. We'd spend my last week together.
SHEILA: I don't think I can stand it.
VIV: Me either.
SHEILA: I just hate it.
VIV: Me too.
SHEILA: I don't see why it has to be this way.
VIV: Me neither.
SHEILA: You're never coming back, are you?
VIV: I don't know. I say I am, but ...
SHEILA: I know. We'll write, and then it'll dwindle down to a card or two and pretty soon you'll forget all about me.
VIV: If you don't forget about me first.
SHEILA: You're my best friend. How can I ever forget you?
VIV: We can't. That's just it. We can't. But we will. We'll have to talk to each other every day, just like we do now.
SHEILA: You can afford a big phone bill. I can’t. And besides, you'll meet all kinds of new people. Pretty soon, you'll have so many friends, “we” won't be important anymore.
VIV: Sheila. We've been friends since forever. We've been through everything together ... we'll always be friends. Forever and ever. Here. You take this.
SHEILA: No. You keep it. It really belongs to both of us.
VIV: I want you to have it.
SHEILA: I want you to have it.
VIV: I don't want it.
SHEILA: Me neither. Throw it away.
VIV: I can't believe I'm moving away. I'll never have
a better friend than you. No matter where I go or what I do.
SHEILA: Me either.
VIV: I don't want to move.
SHEILA: Me neither.
VIV: But I have to.
VIV: We could tear it in two. Each take half.
SHEILA: Or we can have joint custody. You wear it six months, then mail it to me for six months.
VIV: OK. Or you can bring it when you come visit.
SHEILA: Or when you come visit me.
VIV: Oldest and dearest.
SHEILA: Best friends.
TOGETHER: Fever 'n ever. Aaaaahhhhh!!
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